Wednesday, August 22, 2007

The one and only

I have accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Savior. All of you atheist bloggers need to convert or you will go to hell. I saw the truth in a vision. Jesus revealed himself to me. I now believe in miracles, virgin births and global flooding. When I die I will go to heaven to live in paradise and scoff at all you idiot unbelievers. You cannot criticize me because my beliefs must be respected. Any proofs you offer as a counterpoint will be discounted and immediately considered wrong! I will start going to church and will dedicate large portions of my paycheck to ministries that the pastor deems appropriate. I will be a mindless slave and cease to think for myself. All doubters are ignorant. Your comments are welcome!

5 comments:

Larro said...

You were asking about the guy that got booted from the Atheist Blogroll.

The post is http://mojoey.blogspot.com/2007/08/blogroll-update-do-we-vote-agradevaduta.html

I really didn't know what to think of this predicament. I actually thought the guy was pretty liberal, I even went to his Wordpress blog: http://agradevaduta.wordpress.com/

But it was obvious he wasn't an atheist, hence getting booted from the blogroll. Mojoey has since modified the rules for joining by excluding "freethinking" blogs (I think, I don't remember the exact requirements from before).

BTW, I like that: "I will be a mindless slave and cease to think for myself."

Splendid.

tina said...

Have you been to Atheist Hussy's blog? There's a good video she posted. "Zeitgeist" It's 2 hours long though.

Tommy said...

For a moment I was like "April Fools Day isn't for another 7 and a half months!

breakerslion said...

I tried accepting Jesus Christ as my personal savior once. I even went so far as preheating the oven to 400 degrees. Oh wait, that was for a personal pizza. I mean, I showed the guy two forms of ID... no, that was for a personal checking account. I showered and rinsed thoroughly, and dried between my toes? No, that's personal hygiene. What's a personal savior again? Is that like a condom? Will it fold up and fit in a pocket? Can it get you out of a speeding ticket on the Interstate at 2AM? Does it fly in through the window singing, "Here I come to save the day!" in a fruity barritone, like Mighty Mouse? Will it save you from unsavior-y characters like me? I've never seen one. Details! Details!

angelsdepart said...

Imagine having a mindless Superman on quickdial. It's kind of like that.