Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Scamming the scammer

Have you ever been sent one one those scam emails? This is what I like to do when I get them!

I AM MRS FATIMA NORA HASSAN, NOW MRS THERESA COLE, A WIDOW TO LATE
SHEIK MADU HARRIS, I AM 56 YEARS OLD,I AM NOW A NEW CHRISTAIN
CONVERT,SUFFERING FROM LONG TIME CANCER OF THE BREAST, FROM ALL
INDICATION MY CONDITIONS IS REALLY DETERIORATING AND ITIS QUITE
OBVIOUS THAT I WON'T LIVE MORE THAN
THREE MONTHS, ACCORDING TOMY DOCTORS, THIS IS
BECAUSE THE CANCER STAGE HAS GOTTEN TO A VERY BAD STAGE.


MY LATE HUSBAND KILLED DURING THE U.S RAIDAGAINST TERRORISM IN
AFGHANISTAN,AND DURING THE PERIOD OF OUR MARRIAGE WE CULD'NT PRODUCE
ANY CHILD.MY LATE HUSBAND WAS VERY WEALTHY AND AFTER HIS DEATH, I
INHERITED ALL HIS BUSINESS AND WEALTH.


THE DOCTORS HAS ADVISED ME THAT I MAY NOT LIVE FORMORE THAN THREE
MONTHS,SO I NOW DECIDED TO DEVIDE THE PART OF THIS WEALTH,TO
CONTRIBUTE TO
THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE CHURCH IN AFRICA, AMERICA ASIA,AND EUROPE AND
ALSO TO HELP THE NEEDLY ONES.

I AM WILLING TO DONATE THE SUM OF $12,000.000.00 MD U.S DOLLARS, TO
THE LESS PRIVILEGED AND CHURCHES.PLEASE I WANT YOU TO NOTE THAT FUND
IS LYING IN A BANK AND UPON MY INSTRUCTION, MY ATTORNEY, WHO
PRESENTLY IS IN AFRICA
DISTRIBUTING RELIEF MATERIALS TO OF BOMBLAST IN SLERRA-LEONE, WILL
FILE IN AN APPLICATION FOR THE TRANSFER OF THE MONEY IN YOUR NAME.

LASTLY, I HONESTLY PRAY THAT THIS MONEY WHEN TRANSFERRED WILL BE SURE
FORTHE SAID PURPOSE, BECAUSE I HAVE COME TO FIND OUT THATWEALTH
ACQUISITION WITHOUT CHRIST IS VANITY.

MAY THE GRACE OF OUR LORD JESUS THE LOVE OF GOD AND THE FELLOWSHIP OF
GOD BE WITH YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

I AWAIT URGENT REPLY
YOUR'S IN CHRIST
MRS. THERESA COLE.





Dear sister in Jesus

I am glad to help out with this noble cause. Please tell me what more
I need to do to help you out. I know that time is very important so I
am ready to move quickly. I have prayed on this issue and I believe
that God has brought us together to make a great change in this
world. Please write back soon and we can work out the details of what
you would require.

In our Lord




Dear Beloved

First let me thank you sincerely here for your quick response to my request. I pray that the good Lord will give you the desired strength and courage to achieve your heart desire which is raising this organization to help the Aged, Children and your National Park Project. In fact I would whole-heartedly dedicate this fund to you and your society organization because of its humanitarian purpose, I will give directives to my Lawyer to make sure the funds gets to you without delay. One important favor that you will do me is to make sure that my name and my Husband's name has a stand in your Society Organization.

I would want you to send me a Copy of your international passport or Driver's License, and all the necessary documents concerning your Society my Lawyer, He shall use all these to secure all the Documents that shall accompany the money to you through Diplomatic Means .My Lawyer's name is BARRISTER PEDRO RUI MENDES, A PORTUGUSE NATIONAL BUT BASED IN LONDON WHERE HE HAS HIS LEGAL CHAMBERS.

His e-mail address is: ruipmendes@yahoo.co.uk so write him now and tell him that I directed you to contact him for more details on how to deliver the funds to you through diplomatic Courier Means, also I will forward all your information to him, I will also tell him about you right away and he will be expecting your mail, please I will like you to hasten up because It will be of a great JOY to me if I will still be alive to see this Great Project Growing up, With this I will die a more Happier death. I will attach a copy of my picture in the Hospital now so that you will always have me in mind and consider my kindness too ok? Please on receipt of this picture i am sending you now, you must keep it very safe in your computer as this is the only i got now for future references ok?

I must let you know that due to my present health condition that is fast detoriating now, i would love this whole transfer to be completed within a short time because i wish to witness the commencement of this project before i go to answer my glorious call.

Finally, i must advice you here that if in any case you find yourself incapable of carrying out this project with needed attention, please do not hesitate to show your incapability so that i shall go to Lord in prayers for another capable SOUL.

Finally, also forward to my attorney on his above email address, your direct contact telephone/fax numbers including cell phone if any for easy communication, your contact address, your age, current occupation and position.

Yours in Christ Always,
Mrs. Theresa Cole





Dear Christian Sister Mrs. Cole

The Lord has filled my heart with happiness and sadness at the same time. It heavies my heart that such a loving and caring soul must be taken from this earth at what seems to be a most inopportune time. I spoke with my bank about the transaction this afternoon and not only will they back me in continuing forward with this process but they have also agreed to display a commemorative plaque regarding your generous contribution to our great Lord’s work. The bank manager was a bit skeptical regarding the transaction though and suggested that I verify that you are real by having you send me $2 U.S.. Currency through the postal service. Please include your personal return address. The bank says that this can be used to verify an actual location so that we can be assured that the account is not a dummy account and that the money will indeed go to do the Lord’s work. The account that we will be using already has roughly $25,000 in it that we are saving to feed starving children just across from the Mexican border. As soon as I receive these documents from you I can forward you my bank account number, passport and drivers license. I believe that the Lord has brought us together. Please work quickly to verify yourself and may the Lord bless us both. Let me know if this will be possible and I will send you a physical address.

In Christ




Hello My Dear Beloved
Greetings in The Name of Our Lord Jesus Christ,

Many Thanks for your mail just received and the content quite understood. In regards to your e-mail, I must tell you that I feel so sad and disappointed that you did not believe that I am real after sending you my picture just because your bank manager is skeptical about the transaction.

OH’ WHAT A SHAME” WHERE IS YOUR FAIRTH DEAR?

Well, I am sorry to tell you that what you ask me to do is not possible as the funds has already been packaged and sealed by the Diplomatic Courier Company that are going to deliver the funds to you in your country in a CODED BOX as a consignment because due to the 9/11 RECENT BOMB ATTACK in united states, the funds shall be packaged in a CODED BOX as a consignment and delivered to you at your door step in your country through diplomatic Means.

FOR MORE DETAILS, CONTACT MY ATTORNEY ON HIS EMAIL AS I HAVE GIVEN TO YOU BEFORE.

Honestly, I still don’t understand the reason why your bank manager should be skeptical about the transaction, but GOD WILL BEAR ME WITNESS IF I AM FOR REAL OR NOT.

My Dear, I want you to understand that this transaction is not by force, and I will not beg you or force you to do this wonderful work of God Ok? So if the skeptical of your bank manager will make you not to continue with the God’s work, then just forget it.

For your information, this funds will be delivering to you at your door step via a diplomatic Bankers Courier Service and not bank to bank transfer, so let it be known to you that this transaction has nothing to do with your account for now.

You are only required to receive the funds from the diplomatic agent who will be delivering the funds to you in your country and then have it deposited to your bank account yourself.

Moreover, be informed that all the legal documents of this funds has been secured and changed in your name and it cost me about 8,500.00 Pounds Sterling to Secure the documents including Affidavit of change of ownership on your behalf through the help of my lawyer who swear out the Affidavit on your behalf from HER MAJESTY here in London, and I have to closed down my account to secure all these necessary/legal documents on your behalf because I don’t want to bother you about the money for obtaining the documents.

So, there is no how I can even get a cent not to talk of sending you $2 U.S Currency through the postal service now Ok? So, like I stated on my email to you yesterday, if you are incapable of carrying out this project with needed attention, please do let me know your incapability so that I shall go to Lord in prayers for another capable SOUL Ok?

Once Again, Thank you for your kind understanding.
Remain Blessed in the Lord Jesus, Amen.
Truly Yours Sister in Christ,
Mrs. Theresa Cole.




Yea Dear beloved sister Mrs. Theresa Cole

After attending a 42 hour humanitarian relief effort I crashed into my bed for a long sleep. I awoke in the middle of the night to a vision from our great Lord. He told me that you are for real and shamed me for questioning you. It was at that moment that I realized the error of my ways and decided that I needed to meet with you personally to give you the requested documents and lay my hands on you in prayer. I have emptied my life savings and booked a flight to London where I hope to meet with you and your lawyer. I leave in just a little bit so please email me back with the address of the hospital that you are staying at and I will be with you shortly. Also I plan on looking up your lawyer and personally hand delivering the said documents so that you will be spared any shipping fees to the United states. I await your swift reply and look forward to meeting with you soon and eventually, spending eternity in heaven with you.

In Christ our savior




Thank you for your mail and the content quite understood, but unfortunately that won’t be necessary as the funds has left this morning to
PARRIS FRANCE
due to your late response because the Courier company here where the funds was deposited doesn’t tolerate any delays once consignment is packaged for shipment.

So, due to the delay and late response from your end, they have moved the consignment to a security Company in Paris France where you are requested to go and pick up the funds I a cash payment from the officials in the security Company in Paris.

So, be informed that the funds
($12 Million) is now in Paris France in your name, and all you need do is to prepare to make a trip to Paris France. Also be advised to council your flight booked to London and re-book your flight to Paris France Ok?

Documents are not required from you in Paris as my attorney has already sworn an Affidavit of change of ownership of the funds that backed up the and accompanied the consignment/Funds to Paris France. You can as well go to Paris with either your driver’s license or your international passport just for proper identification by the officials in Paris Ok/
However, I also want to inform you that my attorney have just traveled to Africa to defend one of his client who has a Court case with the Government there in Africa, but he shall be communicating with me, you, and the people in Paris France as long as he stay’s there in Africa.

Finally, I have been instructed by my doctor to stop clear off computer because of my present health conditions that gets worst every day and i am going down, so I will be off the computer for some days now or weeks and will not be able to look at my e-mail as the case maybe.

So, for more details on how you are going to Paris, contact my attorney on his email as I gave to you before and asked him to give you more details on how to go Praise to claim the consignment/Funds. My attorney is fully aware of the whole things regarding the France issue as he made the arrangement with the Courier Service here in London because of your delayed. So, also furnish my attorney with the following informations bellow:

Your Full Names and Your Full Contact Address
Your Full Accessible Direct Contact Telephone Numbers including Cell phone number if any. Age Sex, Marital Status, Current Occupation and position.

Once Again, the e-mail address of my attorney is ruipmendes@yahoo.co.uk so kindly contact him now with the requested informations, and also ask him to give you his number he is using temporally in Africa so that you can reach him and talk with him as well and also give my lawyer your own number.
I will also instruct my lawyer to contact you, you should try and contact him because he is always a very busy person.
I will have to stop here for now.
Thank you and remain Blessed in the name of the Lord.
Thanks and God Bless.
Truly Yours Sister in Christ Jesus.
Mrs. Theresa Cole.



Verily I say unto you Miss Sister in Christ our Lord almighty, hail to the all powerful, in Jesus almighty holy divine name Mrs. Theresa Cole..

I have landed in London and checked my email at a local internet station. I was very saddened to see that you had changed the location of the money transfer to Paris France. At this point the money is second to me and I simply want to meet with you and lay my hands on you in prayer. I do not feel that it is appropriate for me to contact your attorney until I have met with you face to face. I know you said that you needed to step away from the computer because of your deteriorating health but I trust in Jesus that he will bring you to your computer one last time to check your email. An even greater blessing happened to me. Yeah truly God is great. Since I was out of money and stranded here in London I had no other option but to go to the embassy. I told the officers there about you and your generosity. I showed them all of the emails and the pictures that you sent me and it turns out that they were looking for you to! They agreed to help me find you. Praise the Lord, they were able to pinpoint your location through the IP addresses that you were using to send your emails and have already set up an airplane. I will be with you shortly to sit by your side through you final hours..

With love in Christ

3 comments:

tina said...

I love that!! Ohhh, I wish I were smart enough to try that! lol!

Shawn Wilkinson said...

"Where is your fairth"

lol!

The grammar and vocabulary made me cringe...but I couldn't stop laughing after reading it ;-p

sacred slut said...

That is fucking brilliant!! I am laughing my head off.